At practice on Tuesday I sustained a concussion. A minor concussion, but my third, and these things apparently have a cumulative effect - the more you have, the more susceptible you are to getting them in the future, and the more damage they can do.
|Photo by Ryan Loewy, about an hour before this stupid concussion.|
The point is, it would be really stupid for me to put myself in a position where the risk of hitting my head again is high. Never mind that I got my first concussion in my shower...
So I'm in mourning.
Roller derby has been an indescribably important part of my life for the last 3 1/2 years. Yes, I will stay involved, probably learn to officiate or train rookies or something, but it won't be the same. Hitting people has been very cathartic, and I'll need to find a healthy substitute to keep myself sane. Also, after playing derby, working out at the gym is even more unappealing by comparison. And being part of a ref crew is, I'm sure, a different social dynamic than being on a team.
Stu keeps telling me not to make any decisions until I'm feeling better, but I don't see any responsible decision that ends with me playing again.
If you need me, I'll be sobbing quietly in the corner.